This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
