my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
