So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
