Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
