Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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