That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
We need to rekindle our bromance
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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