By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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