are you still at the devil's house?
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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