remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
