doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
