you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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