It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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