i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
