I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
