We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
