is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Randomize
