is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
