# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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