We're facebook friends in real life
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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