Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
