fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
