Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
