p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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