so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
