covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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