I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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