Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
