..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
