too bad you live with your parents still
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
