Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one

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(802): View more from Vermont

i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?

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(619): View more from California

I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?

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(248): View more from Michigan

Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me

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