wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
