K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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