i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
