yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
