bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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