You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
