you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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