What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
