Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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