Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
