garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
