He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
