Do you still have your period?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
