you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
