Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
