i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize
