sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
