Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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