Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
