you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
