I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
